#shit that I thought sounded shady af even when I was a child

[takaraphoenix]

What is it with American online shit always assuming everyone has a credit card Jesus fucking Christ

[goddamnmuses-a]

Dan Watches: Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith

Alright so I did this for Episode I which you can find here and then Episode II which you can find here. So here’s my weird live reaction/note taking/whatever this is.. to Episode llI.

War! Huh Yeah! What is it good for?

There are heroes on both sides? We’ll see about that.. 

General Greivous first mention.. provided you’ve not seen the clone wars cartoon. 

So much shit goes down in these opening crawls, like Palpatine being kidnapped. 

Jedi fighters are coooooooool

Vulture droids are kinda cool too

R4 NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Getting the I have a bad feeling about this out of the way early is wise because i feel like if you’re super aware of it, it might take you out of the moment. It’s used well here though. 

This gives me old StarWars Battlefront vibes. 

Ohhh nooooo My boy Savage is dead now... nooooooo.

Why does that guy sound like a surfer dude?

Oh look it’s the Captain America elevator scene but with Jedi. 

R2 is a weapon of mass destruction. 

Anakin seems mature already

Was that flip really needed Dooku?

Do it. 

Palpatine manipulating Ani is goooooood. 

He straight up tries to let Obiwan die and Ani’s not suspiscious? 

Palpatine is like “I swear to god if i die in this crash.. my plans.. all my plans.. fucked.”

“Another Happy Landind” Obiwan has Bob Ross vibes. 

Yeaaaah Organa 

Padme: Yaaay im a mom. Anakin: Well fuck... I mean yay.

“The happiest moment of my life” actually pretty sad knowing whats to come. 

Cal’s just a baby on a starfighter right now doing some training on The Albedo Brave.. poor baby.

Awwwh hun you aint having them babies.. not alive anyway. 

Love has blinded him, he’s a dark sider now. 

That dream could just be a normal child birth.. those things are intense. 

You know what, if they went to Obi-Wan he’d be like “FFs Anakin” but then he’d help because Obi is the best boy. 

Yoda as cool as he is.. could do a bit more. 

Obiwan knows Palpatines no good. 

This is just me stanning Obi now. 

I wonder if Ewan McGregor has seen the Clone Wars cartoon. 

Anakin you gotta earn your place, don’t be Episode 2 whiney bitch Ani again.

I wonder if we ever get any High Republic stuff will it go into Yoda and the Wookies. 

 Even the council are like.. Hmm.. Palpatines shady. 

“The chancellor is not a bad man” errrr... 

Yoda knows somethings up

Even Padme is like “Palpatine’s a bit of a cunt.”

Palpatines a good story teller tbf, even if he’s telling the story of killing his own master

Anakin apologising and like.. that look of Proud dad on Obi’s face.. awh hun. 

Eveyrones getting into Positions for Order 66... Wounds still fresh for me since playing Fallen Order. 

Scary alien man not so scary.. he’s alright. Don’t judge a book by it’s cover kids. 

Yaaay cool mounts. 

“Hello There.” We stan. 

The fact Obiwan doesnt managed to take a second lightsaber and use it in this fight is a missed opportunity for some duel weild coolness. 

Greivous skittering away is creepy af. 

I like both these mounts. 

“The dark side surrounds the chancellor” you know theres a sith lord somewhere... maybe like.. go get him? 

This is it, this is Ani’s decision time, they’re circling like tigers gonna fight

Ani realises he’s the Sith and still is like “Hmm.. but maybe he’s right tho”

Rip Grievous. 

Mace Windu should really tell a bunch of other people about Palpatine being a Sith like Ani just said. 

Oh he did, nevermind. 

...That long distance stare off is strange though. 

WTF is that noise when Palpatine does his spin.. gonna have fucking nightmares about that noise. 

KIT FISTO NOOOO YOU HAD A BEAUTIFUL SMILE!

Mace could have killed Palpatine and saved us all a lot of hassle if he was just faster. 

Those no’s are grim. 

Palpatines acting is pretty good..pathetic but good. 

POWER!!! UNLIMITED POOOWWEEEERRRR!!!

You know what.. I’m with Samuel L Jackson, Mace Windu could have survived that. 

Where’d he pull the name Darth Vader out of? Is there a naming convention for Sith or is he just like... Vader is a cool sounding thing. 

You know what.. Anakin falls to servitude sooo fast. He’s such a bottom.

How come the clones don’t attack Anakin, how’d they know hes alright? 

This movie really just.. makes it seem like the Clones just betray the Jedi when we all know it’s the chip. 

Long head guy whos name i never remember NOOOOOOOO

Aayla Sekura.. i remember your name because damn ;) .. Noooooooo!

ANAKIN YOU LEAVE THAT YOUNGLING ALONE

You know what would be good..  if Anakin just got beat the shit out of by the younglings and thats how he died. 

Damn that young padawans a bad ass.

and he’s dead :(

Awwh Tarfful and Chewie.

Hey fuck you Anakin you whore. 

Going back to the temple is a gooood scene. 

Anakin you dick... i mean kill these assholes but the poor babies :c

Sith eyes kick in real quick. 

I suppose killing all those kids that he rly didnt need to because they could have just become Inquisitors did help/hinder? 

So this is how liberty dies.. good line Padme, nice.

Love Obi warning other Jedi to gtfo, We stan. 

Some dodgy acting in this scene but i’ll overlook it

Obiwan just taking a shit on the way to kill his boy.

Darth Maul has a more intimidating hologram.. good thing you’re gonna get cooked and become more intimidating. 

In a way Darth Vader did kill Anakin so Obiwan isn’t exactly lying to Luke about it.

Anakin never loved Padme. Controversial Opinion but i think he just had a childhood crush on her and never got over it. He wouldn’t have force choked her so quickly otherwise. He gets jealous like instantly, basically if you’re looking for an example of a toxic relationship.. here we go. 

Nice touch with the light being behind Obi and darkness behind Vader. 

Noooo Yoda. 

Euurghhh nails on chalkboard sound. 

“There’s no sign of his body” “Then he’s not dead” I’m sorry I thought Jedi faded to nothingness? 

This fights pretty epic tho

“From my point of view the jedi are evil” alright.. ya lil bitch

I think the I have the high ground thing is just an attempt to get Anakin to stop, a last desperate attempt. 

“You underestimate my-” Cut in half. 

Obi fucks up by not finishing him off tbf. 

Luke’s first apperace chronologically!

aand Leia. .. So Luke’s older... idk why i felt the need to state that but heyo

Yo is Vader’s vision always red?

“There’s good in him, i know” dies. .. Thats not something that someone whos lost the will to live would say. 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Oooooh in the Disney+ Obi show will we get him learning to communicate with Qui Gon.. pls. 

C3P0′s mind gets wiped..  a bunch.. but not R2. 

The funeral scene is nice. 

Damn they started work on the first death star like right away. 

TBF they also started work on Starkiller base pretty quick too so.. naa fair this checks out. 

Alderaan is gorgeous. 

Yo, Luke’s aunt is hot. 

You know what, Owen and Beru don’t get enough credit. 

Well that’s that.. I think I like this the most out of the prequels followed by Ep 1 then Ep 2.

[phdna]

*arriving a month late with Starbucks and an uninteresting Endgame review*

This took me forever to write because work has been very intense lately, but I have thoughts I want to write down, for my own future reference when I’m an old woman looking back on my life, if for nothing else.

SPOILERS AHEAD, of course!

From whatever little I’ve been online since Endgame came out, it seems like the internet has been on fire swearing undying love, eternal hate and everything in between. I’m used to that because the MCU fandom has a tendency to be like that, but it feels like this time is more intense, which puzzled me a little bit, as it mostly adheres to the Marvel rules of storytelling, and people tend to not fuss over movies that do that as much as they do over movies that break the established MCU patterns. And then I did some reading and watching and talking and it just hit me that people aren’t reacting to Endgame itself, they’re reacting to the MCU. Both people who think it’s the best movie ever and people who think it’s absolute trash aren’t talking a lot about the movie, they’re talking about how the movie handled the end of this long journey that was the MCU. (Exception: time travel. I’ll get back to it in a moment!) I know I’m having a Captain Obvious moment here, but bear with me for a moment, I’m going somewhere with this.

Here’s the thing: as long as there are more movies coming, we can all overlook things we dislike about the MCU really well – “they’ll just fix it later,” right? Or we can fix it ourselves, even if we don’t write/read fics – the endless theories about what the next movies are gonna be about are in large part wish-fulfillment. Maybe next time Marvel will have more representation of all kinds, maybe next time Marvel will develop their female characters as much as their male counterparts, maybe next time Marvel will focus on this particular relationship that is either underdeveloped or so developed that it should get more attention, maybe next time Marvel will direct a character arc towards where I think it should go. But when the end arrives, we have to face that we aren’t in charge of the MCU and have sometimes wildly different expectations that what the Powers That Be have in mind. We have been emotionally invested in this universe for a long time – we bring the MCU with us in our lives even away from screens – and it sucks a little to realize that, ultimately, we are powerless to impact it. If Endgame was 100% everything you’ve always wanted for every single character and for the universe as whole, great! You’re still gonna mourn the end a little bit, but it’s cool! But if you feel like even one character of the dozens in the cast got the short end of the stick, you’re gonna be upset because don’t we all wish we could sit down with Marvel and teach them Why They Are Wrong About This Character?

I hope I’m not sounding holier-than-thou, like I’m being absolutely cool and adult about the whole thing. Hell no. I’d fight Kevin Feige in a parking lot any time, and have been ready to do that since huh… the MCU started. (Especially because the MCU has taken over the comics and I like 616 more than I like the MCU, so I’ve got beef with Marvel for that.)

So yeah, I have plenty of “What? No! Whose idea was that, that’s terrible!” moments, but I always try to focus on what I enjoyed more than on what I hated. Sometimes it doesn’t work and I get forever bitter, but most of the time, I make an active effort to 1) be grateful that WE EVEN HAVE GOOD SUPERHERO MOVIES AT ALL and 2) watch the movies I’m actually watching instead of watching the movies I think I should watch. For instance, I want to set myself on fire whenever I think about how un-family-like the Avengers are in the MCU, but since being a family isn’t a story the MCU is trying to tell, I consciously try to find something I enjoy about the constant conflicts, such as what they tell us about what each character believes, and how they keep coming back together to do the right thing despite their differences.

Arguably, that’s too much effort, and I get why some people want to be entertained and get upset if the MCU doesn’t deliver that entertainment – I mean, movies are supposed to be fun. But since I was a kid, I’ve always been a fan of imperfect things I have no control over, and I muddle through what I don’t enjoy to get to the shiny bits that give me goosebumps and keep me up at night feeling giddy over how good something was. It’s part of how I react to stuff I like by now. I don’t know, maybe it’s my History degree talking, but I don’t see what the big deal is with saying “Some of it sucks, some of it is brilliant, some of it has to be challenged on the ground of human rights, but overall I’m interested in learning more about it.”

Why the essay on how to engage with the MCU?

Because no matter how I think about it, my primary opinion about Endgame isn’t “I think it’s good” or “I think it’s bad” but just “I’m thankful.” That’s it. I can’t look at Endgame and see it as an isolated movie. I look at it and think “God, I was just out of school when Tony said I am Iron Man and now I’m a teacher and the MCU has always been there helping me keep track of the passage of time all these years.” Here, have a bad analogy: Endgame is when you finish a long travel and there’s nothing home to eat and you have to unpack and you’re exhausted and normal life is depressing and you have a headache and you’re frustrated that holidays are over and you didn’t do everything you wanted…. but that doesn’t make the entire travel a waste of time, does it? It’s actually the opposite. If the travel sucks, getting home is great. And very, very, very few people walk out of Endgame saying “Thank god this MCU saga is over, ugh, I was following it just out of obligation and I’m glad I’m free now” – I mean, there are people like that, and I can see why, but I also never finish things just out of obligation so I can’t relate. Anyway, mostly, people either expected more because the MCU is good enough to do better or thought this was the perfect ending. I’m both. Some things I loved, some things I really wish would be different, but mostly, I’m, like I said, grateful that the journey was so good that no ending would’ve fully satisfied me.

My biggest problem is with time travel. I’ve never liked the trope (not huge on alternate universes, either!), so I knew this would be a pet peeve even before I watched Endgame. I’m also surprised that apparently nobody involved in the movie can agree on how aforementioned time travel works. Fans certainly can’t. And I don’t think it’s a good thing if your audience is confused by a major part of your movie, even if there is a perfectly good explanation and the audience just didn’t get it. (Which isn’t the case, as apparently there isn’t a perfect explanation.) But you know what? I’m hand-waving it. It’s a convoluted plot device but it made a good movie, so like, whatever. Let it work in ABC way unless XYZ needs to happen, in which case, XYZ is how it’s always worked regardless of how ABC was used before. I don’t care. I’m taking what they say happened and saying “Okay, that’s how it happened” and ignoring the hows and the whys. It’s just bad comic book logic on the big screen, I’ve been rolling with this kind of thing since I was a literal child. Having said that, I don’t know what year it is in the MCU, I don’t know how Spider-Man will work, I’m not touching Cap’s time paradox with a ten-foot pole, and I’m not even gonna try to understand any of the timeline charts going around online.

My other major problems have to do with real life more than with the movie. The only original female Avenger dies in the same way the only original female Guardian of the Galaxy died, and neither of them get funerals but we do get the men in their lives suffering over it (which switches the focus from mourning the women to the men’s journeys.) Not sure if the joke was that Thor was clinically depressed or if the joke was that Thor was fat, but haha hilarious. The first openly queer character is omg a nameless cameo talking about someone we never see, isn’t the MCU so progressive? (The bar was so low that Marvel had to dig a ditch so they could somehow get lower than that.) Not loving the idea of “Thanos treated Gamora like shit but the Soul Stone recognizes he loved her” and “Tony’s dad was awful but Tony can Forgive Him” being presented as touching – it’s creepy af and makes me wonder if the MCU will end up saying Alexander Pierce actually cared about Bucky somewhat or something of that sort. Female hero team up: unironically loved it and want it projected on my tombstone (it was one of my favorite part), but it’s a little disturbing that almost none of them had much of a storyline in the movie because they don’t have much of a storyline in the MCU – it really highlights that Marvel has a boy’s club problem still. Now, none of these things make for a bad movie, it just reminds me that Marvel has a long way to go with they want to become inclusive.

Okay, now on to storylines…

Tony. Loved it. I love how the Russos direct Tony (I do have a problem with how M&M write Tony, sometimes, though, and always have) because they love to highlight how soft Tony’s heart is. Part of what makes the character interesting in any universe is that he’s willing to do morally shady stuff when he thinks he’s justified and he tends to think he’s justified because he knows exactly how smart he is, but if you explore this borderline antihero behavior without a deep commitment to reminding the audience that Tony is emotional and gentle, you end up with Reed Richards. 616!Tony will always be sweeter than MCU!Tony (even though 616!Tony’s dad literally tried to beat emotions out of him, while MCU!Tony’s dad more ignored him than actively tried to make him colder, but that’s besides the point) but Tony was so openly loving in this movie, and it helps make his death hit home, why so many people will miss Iron Man and Tony I pity Morgan a lot because she won’t remember her dad, but the only way to feel like the torch has truly been passed to other heroes was to kill Tony – keep him alive in any way and characters are gonna want his advice even if he stops fighting. I want to see how other heroes will protect a world without Iron Man. It’s exciting and brand new and feels a bit like when Fury said in 2008 that Tony isn’t the only superhero.

Steve. Let’s take the time paradox at face value and say everything goes well in every possible timeline and nobody suffers more than they would if he hadn’t done his time-heist thing, because I think that’s what the movie wanted to imply. I’m actually happy he got to be with Peggy. It’s not how I’d write him, mind you, but I always knew MCU Steve was being written as someone who is inherently out of place in the modern world. In the comics, Steve has a culture shock and he mourns people, but he finds a new family in the Avengers and truly becomes part of this century. MCU Steve was never that guy. And that’s okay, it’s a valid take! Not what I’d do, but given his storyline throughout the other movies, I think it’s a very satisfying ending that feels very organic. Saying “screw everything, I’ll do what I think it’s important” has been Steve’s constant in all movies, and it’s nice that he learned that he is important too, not just everybody else. Handing the shield was also very important – no “I think he’d want you to have it” to fuel conspiracy theories in the future: Steve made a good decision and that’s fine. (And I’ll cut a bitch if y’all keep saying “maybe Bucky had the shield before” because Sam can be a first choice fgs!!!)

Professor Hulk is a thing and I liked it more than I thought I would. Hopefully we’ll see more of him. I liked Bruce and I liked the Hulk, but somehow this version of him made me go from “Yeah, they’re nice” to “PLEASE TELL ME HE’LL HAVE A SOLO MOVIE” so good job in redeeming the Hulk franchise, Marvel! It only took you 10 years to get the right tone, but hey, what matters is that you did it!

Thor…….. Um. Hard. I liked his character arc but hated how it was handled. I’m not even a huge fan of Ragnarok because comedy isn’t my thing, but watching Ragnarok, I could see why the movie worked and the humor didn’t come at the expense of being fair to the character. Endgame felt more like the movie itself was bullying him. They’re laughing at his pain, basically, and it’s just not funny. It bothers me for the same reason it bothers me when people say pre-serum Steve should never leave home – just… no. But then, we got Thor and Frigga and I’d sell a kidney for more Frigga, so, it wasn’t completely awful. Just like, 90%?

Natasha!!! I hope everybody who said Scarjo can’t act paid attention to this movie, because she gave Nat a depth that we haven’t seen since CATWS, and even then, because it was Steve’s story, she was sidelined. That’s the Nat I’ve always wanted in the MCU. …and of course, she’s dead. Luckily, we don’t know anything about MCU!Nat, so we can still get prequels even if they don’t want to bring her back to life. It’s a little shady that she dies (why is it that the randomly decided death always seem to be randomly assigned to whatever the minority in a team is, huh?) but I love that she sacrificed herself for the greater good. It’s a heroic end to a woman who thought she was gonna be a villain her entire life. Oh, oh, oh, I have to say this: Natasha leading the remaining Avengers? Godtier. I’m not much of a fic person but I desperately want fics of that off-screen period where she’s being a boss.

Clint. MCU!Clint never did much for me, so I was impressed that I was rooting so much for him during the movie. I don’t know if he’ll just retire completely, but I’m hoping he doesn’t so we can see more of him in the MCU.

Okay, that’s the original Avengers and I’ve already written……. Too much. So I’ll stop – sort of – here.

But first, other random comments.

Fight choreography? On point, 10/10, would let Marvel beat me up to experience these sequences myself

“I am inevitable.” “I am Iron Man.” I cried so much the screen got blurry and I almost missed the snap. Thank you for this exchange.

I love and support Morgan, but I’m dreading the idea that in a near future, the MCU will get Riri’s entire story and give it to Morgan. Please, MCU, I’m counting on you, have Morgan grow up to befriend Riri, not to steal her role.

Nebula needs a solo movie. Nebula needs a whole cinematic universe, actually. What a character.

Speaking of which, GotG 3 is shaping up to be very cool

Sam being the one to say “On your left” in the movie where he becomes Captain America? Poetic cinema. Also! Sam Wilson is Captain America and both the human being who wants children to grow up in a better world and the geek who wants to see flying Cap in me are equally over the moon with joy

Bucky, my darling, the MCU hasn’t known what to make of you since 2011. It’s okay, Sebastian Stan will always do his magic and make you be Bucky even when Marvel doesn’t fully understand anything about your character

Pepper’s character development in 10 years is protagonist-worthy, I can’t believe how she always only has a couple of scenes every movie

Tom Holland should not be allowed to have crying scenes, they make my heart hurt

The movie feels a lot shorter than it is

There’s a lot more I could say, but I’m writing it on Word (tumblr sometimes eat my text posts as I’m writing them) and the wordcount is nearing 3k, so I better shut up. If you’ve read all of this, please treat yourself to a milkshake, you’re awesome. If there’s anything you want to talk about that I didn’t address (or just… you know, about Marvel in general), my ask and my direct messages are always open. I’ll probably take forever to get back to you (I NEED A VACATION ASAP) but I will eventually answer you and I don’t bite, so please go ahead if you’re curious about my not-so-very-interesting thoughts :)

TL;DR: Endgame isn’t my favorite movie (IM, IM3, CATFA, CATWS and BP all come first, sorry) but it’s up there in the “I can watch this movie a thousand times and I won’t get tired of it” list, and I think it does a fairly good job in ending the Infinity Saga, so I’m basically pleased!

[mtvswatches]

Jane the Virgin 1x19 Chapter Nineteen

Spoilers disclaimer (please read before sending messages or writing comments.)

Click here for previous recaps!

Stray thoughts

1) Are they bringing up that cringy flower metaphor because Jane is going to have sex?

2) Look, if you go through the seven stages of grief overnight, maybe the relationship that you’re grieving didn’t mean that much, to you to begin with…

3) OH FUCK, YOU’RE SHITTING ME!!

And what do you know? I finally agree with Rafael. He’s making a lot of sense – it’s true that it’s better to call it off before the baby is even born, which would complicate things so much more AND IT’S THE EXACT REASON WHY I ALWAYS THOUGHT THEY SHOULDN’T HAVE GOT TOGETHER AT ALL. And they shouldn’t stay together just not to “give up” – not if they’re always fighting! That’s how toxic relationships begin…

4) What is Roman planning to do with Petra? Also, murderer confirmed. He did kill his brother. Harsh.

5) I really, really hope they don’t stretch out this Xiomara-lying-to-Rogelio thing.

6) Ugh this is really exasperating!

She’s holding on to this glorified idea of a fairy tale romance and she doesn’t accept the reality that’s in front of her, which is that they’re not right for each other, at least not right now. I’M SO FUCKING TIRED OF THIS PLOT ISTG

7) COUPLE’S THERAPY?!!! Seriosuly??¡asdjlasdladaldlkasda

I’m sorry but how can’t she realize that if you need couple’s therapy after dating for what?, two months?, then maybe you’re not as meant to be as you think you are. THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS!

8) Okay, that whole scene where Rafael and Jane describe their relationship in a nutshell was absolutely hilarious. So much shit has happened this season, it’s insane!

9) So Roman is basically taking over Rose’s drug-dealing “business.”

10) Petra is resourceful af, I love her. Let’s just hope she doesn’t get caught when she tries to use the cell phone.

11) PLEASE, RAFAEL, PLEASE, I’M BEGGING YOU HERE, DON’T BE WILLING TO DO THE WORK TO FIX THINGS. JUST DON’T. I’M EXHAUSTED. I CAN’T HANDLE THIS ANYMORE.

12) Wait. I just had a terrifying thought. They’ve brought up the sex thing, and Jane is desperately trying to make things work with Rafael for some reason. Does this mean that she will have sex with him in a last ditch effort to “save their relationship”? I don’t know if I’ll be able to survive that shit.

13) Andie is a shady bitch and I hope she’s gone soon, k? Thx, bye.

14) This is such an iconic masterpiece…

(I tried to find a video link for this scene, but I couldn’t, and I was afraid if I kept digging I’d get spoiled about something.)

15)  OMG

16) I’d forgive him.

17) OMG!!!!!!

That’s probably the best out-of-context line ever.

18) Why doesn’t she just run away?

19) Okay, good, she eventually ran. It just would’ve made more sense to ran first and make the phone call when she was away from him.

20) Oh, cool, she impaled Roman again.

21) They’re reading out these lists they wrote weeks ago, but I remember Rafael cheated because he showed his to Jane since she was freaking out about them not knowing each other well enough. UGHHHH AND NOW THEY’RE BACK TOGETHER???!!!! IS THIS MY PERSONAL VERSION OF HELL?!!! IT’S STARTING TO FEEL LIKE IT!

22) Uh-oh…

I think we’ll see how Rogelio and Xiomara deal with the exact same situation…

23) They’re going to have sex, aren’t they?

UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH

24) Bless your kind soul, Nick, you’re literally godsend!

25) Bless Xiomara for being the voice of reason.

26) What, Michael, what did you see?!!!

27) Holy shit, Nadine was working for Sin Rostro the whole time!

At least he gave her some time to get the hell away before they get her arrested.

28) My sweet Rogelio, he felt so guilty - even though he didn’t do anything wrong - and he confessed! And of course, Xiomara is taking advantage of his good-nature to get away with what she did…

29) It kind of breaks my heart that Petra reached out to Rafael first. Poor lonely girl, she has no one to turn to.

30) Like, I’m glad they’re broken up, but what he said sounded totally made up? And purposefully hurtful?

RAFAEL: Look, last night got me thinking, too. And I realized that something has changed.

JANE: What?

RAFAEL: I just don't love you the way that you love me. That's the problem. That's why this won't work.

JANE: I don't believe you.

RAFAEL: Look, I know that this hurts to hear

JANE: Why are you saying this?  

RAFAEL: Because I thought that I did. But I guess I just got caught up in the idea of us being a family. Of you being the mother of my child. And I was just projecting so much onto that. But I am seeing things clearly now. I think that we should end it. Focus on how we can both be good parents

31) Cool, the narrator will explain why this sounded so OOC. I’m sure someone pressured Rafael for some reason…

32) Okay, so no one forced him to do it, he truly believes being apart is the best thing for them and their child, and I have to agree with him. I just hope we’re over with this back and forth for a while. I’m beyond tired of it.

33) Did she really choose this moment to tell him? Did she forget what Jane said about his pride? Why would she humiliate him further by telling him about it in front of an audience while they’re doing a photoshoot?

He has every right to be angry, though. But I hope they can make up, they’re the most functional couple in this show, tbh.

34) And this has nothing to do with the fact that Michael just learned that Jane and Rafael broke up…

35) ALBA RECOGNIZED HER!!!

36) Even though I might just a tad tired of the whole Rafael/Jane thing - just a tad, mind you - I really can’t wait to see what the final episodes of this season have in store. I hae a feeling the season will end with a bang. Although I hope not literally. 

37)  Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi.Thanks!

[swayinghummingbirds]

i feel like i need to blog more stuff out of me to research my own thoughts ignore me or help me either is welcomed. 

so like i was diagnosed with mdd , panic/anxiety disorder so i know how it goes and how it feels and all that jazz. used to be on medication and not for almost two years. i can usually cope well since while i was on medication ifound many ways to do so. but now ive come across season affective disorder and i gotta say i am not a fucking fan. i cant bring myself to do the coping mechanisms because im fucking cold and there is no sun ever.  

this time last year i felt the exact same way and almost moved back to fl but didnt want to give up on tn yet. but im wondering is it maybe time to give up on it? i have no family here. and my family is expanding and growing without me. which makes it worse. 

ive been where i am for almost a year now and its been good. but there are no sidewalks like anywhere? im so tired of sharing walls. sure, its a townhouse and its pretty big and two floors and fire place but my neighbors are so annoying and for some reason in tennessee so many people think its absolutely okay to let their dogs out with leashes? 

knoxville is a really cool city and ive loved living here but idk if i can stand the winter. and its just a mild winter, idk how yall in the north handle it. i see now why when i moved abck to pa for 8 months my mom had it by the time march came around and we moved back to fl. 

a part of me feels like i might even just get bored with where i am after a certain amount of time considering how i was brought up. i have moved 17 times, which is wild for a child. probably why i have a hard time making friends too. 

tried leaving work yesterday after i got my list done (usually isnt a problem for my manager but the ass. manager always fights me with it). i told him three times i already had 2 1/2 hours of overtime and ill be leaving when im finished but bitch never listens to me and acts like he didnt hear me say it to his damn face.Usually i ask just to be polite and make sure but this time im telling him. kind of snapped on him because the day before i just cried all fucking day and had that feeling in my stomach and felt the same way when i woke up. old me would have called out, one because the position i was in was easily fillable but now im actually needed so i go to do my job and if i get done early that means im working my ass off and sweating like a pig to get done three hours early. (and the girl who does the work on the two days im off never gets the shit down or sets the room or anything up in order to have a good morning because the whole thing is very time sensitive and its very frustrating. also she called out like three times this week and made my week shittier than it needed to be.) like bitch no that doesnt mean i want to stay and help with other things after exerting so much energy that i dont even have in myself to begin with. so anyways i cried and then the manager came and talked to me and was understanding because he is aware of my mental health issues and i forgot steve- the ass manager (assistant manager , but also ass because he can be an ass) was not aware. so all in all i talked to my manager and told him and he was very supportive and then i went to apologize to steve and he reassured me i was valued and adored here which was nice. and i had to basically tell him if im trying to leave early it usually means because im feeling like a crazy bitch whos on the break of a mental breakdown so. quit fighting me. 

so anyways. 

even if i did move back fl ive finally gotten myself where i wanted to be in my job but i guess if it was meant to be the universe will take care of it just like it did when we moved here. 

a week before almost moving back to fl my grandparents came to visit and we were in crossville, which is the half way point from here to where we were living at the time and i was like hey lets try knoxville and the next day we went to look at apartments and as we were looking this place went up for rent almost as if the universe here, ask and you shall receive. because i was only looking at places that was in between the three stores that we could have possibly transferred to because i had no idea which one it was going to be i just new it was going to happen. and then when trying to transfer we my fiancees assistant manager knew the manager at this store here and said that he would take both of us and needed help in the area i wanted to be in and i was like wow amazing its all working out. and it did and it was great and then it got cold. and then holidays came. and birthdays came. and i ive learned so much about myself and i feel like yes i needed this part of my life. and now im not sure if istill need it. 

we have a vision of owning a little home a nice big plot of land near the mountains with a spring and creek on site with woods around. if we kept it up and really searched when the time came yeah im feel like we could find it. but what if i still feel this way when were there? then weve bought a home and it would be harder to get rid of. i have a vision of my own business with yoga. i find myself in capable of moving between the months of decemeber and march. then what. even when i get on to the mat i cant get into the flow. 

and what if we move back to fl. would he resent me for giving up on our dreams? will i be tired of people demanding my time and energy? will i bitch about the heat all the time and the fact that neighbros are every where? probably, yes, yes, and yes. 

but will i resent him for not moving back to spend our lives with our families? will i resent myself for not listening to the feeling in my stomach? or would i resent myself if i did listen to that feeling and gave up on the mountainous dreams. 

i know we would welcomed back with opened arms and i know not many would miss us here. 

the mountains are beautiful and so mystical when there. i wonder how it would be to live there. i always end up feeling so creeped out at some point of hikes because i feel like something is watching us, and i know there is, there is always is whether its and animal or a spirit. but sometimes those spirits, or beings, are just so strong of a force. what if we bought a property with one of those that wouldnt be able to make peace with us? i always imagined if we ended up with a property with strong entities then we would make peace and ring singing bowls and plant luscious plants for them. but what if they hate it all. and what if our neighbors down the street end up being cannabilistic cult people? what if some animal tried to maul my dog (which already happens frequently, shes a chihuahua everything is out to get her). what if something happens at oak ridge? i had no idea i was living next to a giant nuclear power plant thing. 

but then its like okay what if theres a giant hurricane that tears my house down (i had a tree fall on my house during matthew which is one reason why we left) or the storm sturge sweeps my house away. trey is scared of tsunamis, not that one has happened there probably ever, idk but it is a weird fear of his. surprisingly tornados do happen in tn too. 

and a day like today, where trey is working all day and i have the day off. there isnt much to do. its cold out so i cant sit on my patio for a few hours like i would in the summer. i dont like to go shopping. i dont have a friend to hang out with, which is my own fault people im really not a big people person. i have hung out with a couple a few tiems, and idk ij ust would rather not. but if i were in fl i could go hang out with my brother, or treys sister, or the few friends i have there. or go to the beach and sit on my own, because its not fucking weird to sit alone there and usually you dont have to worry about getting mugged. i cant go to the parks here on my own. i cant take my dog for walks around here because there are no side walks and people just look shady af everywhere. 

when i went to visit for my brothers wedding in october i realized how i did not appriciate the plant life naturally around all year round when i lived there for 11 years. i guess mostly because it wasnt until two years ago that i really got in to plants but omg i cant stop imagining what our yard would look like if we were in aplace where things could just be outside all year round. i would take cuttings of my plants andjust put them every where have my own little tropical paradise in my front and back yard. 

i know this all is really sounding one sided atm but this time last year i was having the exact same visions and the exact same thoughts. and i thought about how what if my brother has kids and im up here well hello here we are now and thats happening. i feel like i need to be there. theres even a house for sale on the same street as him and all i could was fantasize what i would do to the house and how i would baby sit for them and be able to see my dog that i left with him because ultimately she was is but we co owned her together and just to be there. and be with my mom. shes living in orland with her boyfriend and i feel like the fact shes goingt o be a grandmother might sway him into moving closer, she hates the city and i imagine shes just as depressed as i am to be away and to be in a city where you dont feel safe to go outside alone. we are creatures of nature and both pisces and very sensitive to everything. 

and what if trey and i have a baby at some point? we have no one here to help us. i was thinkg about how our wedding date is a year and like two months away and i have no one here to help me plan. and for a long itme i always imagined myself getting married at this place called sugar mill gardens, a botanical garden that i had always loved in my home town there. when trey and i got together we would pokemon go there and take clippings, and i still have those plants today. but then this new vision came where we would get married on our future property. i feel like we are still a long way away from buying a house here though. idk if we would be there in time. and since we went back in october all i can think about is getting married in sugar mill. he reproposed to me when we were there and that was so sweet and just made me want to be there instead for it. 

this is very long but these are my constant thoughts that all happen at once and it feels nice to get them out to piece them together and not feel so overwhelmed with all them at one time in layers upon layers of thoughts. sometimes my vision even goes out and i dissociate and just work blurred vision cross eyed for ten minutes, who knows maybe its an hour. im back there by myself for eight hours a day idk. 

[tellywoodtrash]

bepannaah 19.03.18 lb

right. let’s do this. entertain me, ridiculously good looking ppl.

oh fuck what, is this a one hour show? please tell me it’s just for the first ep, coz i’ve already lost interest if this is a one hour daily. i don’t have the strength to keep up with this kinda bs.

god, it’s unfair how pretty this girl is. honestly.

seems like has god has compensated by giving her a real besuraaa voice tho. bb girl, pls stop.

oh god she’s one of those ‘aaaap’ and ‘hum’ ppl.

also weirdly codependent on her husband for weird shit like remembering song lyrics? ok???????

what exactly is this hot mess that she’s making???? somewhere in an alt universe, omkara singh oberoi’s chest hurts from the violation of “art” that’s happening here.

lel “hum aapka jhoot hamesha pakad lete hai” foreshadowingggggggg

hubba hubba who this mancakeeeee. chehra dikhaa jaanemann!

haaaaaaaaaaye his puppy eyes. such cyooot.

hmmmmmm this one’s wife is sick of playing mom to him within 3 minutes of show starting.

… is she not wearing a blouse????

ok no i see flashes of it.

lmao this pettyass child, threatening to go to a different continent, just so he can get chain ki neend.

why is she in such a panicccccc coz she can’t find yash??? aadmi hai, billi toh nahi, jo darwaaza khula chod diya toh kho jaayega.

god what a motley crew of nonsense naukar??

ok fwding this stupid comedy bit about her “art”

lo aa gaaya gareebon ka varun dhawan.

actually he looks like lovechild of varun dhawan and vatsal sheth. and naman shaw. (remember him???) or something.

here this actual man child is still sulking. now over toothpaste or some shit.

wow his mom just sauntered right into the loo. like, do ppl in tellywood just not have any issues with walking into the loo when someone else is there or what? i’d scream the fucking house down.

great he forgot her bday. idiot.

oh he’s arnav singh raizada type - making a habit of forgetting every year. baaad husband! bad!

the dubbing of this ep is realllly off and it’s bothering me.

he filmyyyy. lol. i like.

ooooooh. diaryyyyyyyyy. this is gonna come in play laterrrrrrr.

“bachpan se teri diary dekhta aa raha hoon”

oh ho, they’re bachpan ke saathi and all that. interesting.

damn girl, loook guiltierrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

also, writing your secrets in a diary is the dumbest shit ever? like, why would you leave a paper trail, so easy to access? its 2018, put it on a private blog or some shit.

ok he didn’t read it. but he’s gonna. you just wait, he gonna read that thing before her body goes cold.

pooja is a scorpio forsho. hella relate to her secretive, none-of-your-damn-business ways.

oh greatttttttttt, he’s another omkara singh oberoi with the whole I HATE LIES bs

god, this woman is still hung up on her bhaddaaaa sa sculpture thing.

lol her hubs is like plz, no more. lord give the spouses of “artists” patience, coz honestly, they’re tiresome af.

he’s also an aap hum dude. i think i like aditya’s way of talking better.

yeah that i love you of his rang realllllllllllll hollow.

oh ho ho. zoya here is stealing tricks from the shivaay singh oberoi book of romance, holi chapter.

“zoya mere kapde gande ho jayenge.” “toh phir utaar dijiyega.”

OH SNAAAAAAAAAAAAP I LIKEEEEEEEEEE.

damn, she just insinuated getting dirrrrrty and then cleaning up together later.

YEAH GIRL. BE SEX POSITIVE AND TAP THAT BOOTY.

i mean, i’d rather you tap that other one’s fine booty, but abhi ke liye yeh bhi chalega.

smartphones are a curse upon modern day relationships.

… bro you’re indian. you don’t get dubai visa that easily in spur of moment. you gotta apply for that shit in advance. go to qatar. visa on arrival for indians these days.

oh that was HER mom, not his???? that makes the bathroom intrusion even weirder and creepier. like damn saasumaa, boundaries.

LMAO HE CUTE AF

oh ho, hint of financial issues. he borrows money from her? she’s the richer one? interestinggggg.

she’s an artist too? what exhibition???

god he’s sooooooooo cute. also their little head tilt thing was adorbs. i def like these two as a couple better.

why is she so uncomfortableeeee with him? this is not the face you make when a husband this hot is attempting to feel ya up. girl you shady affff.

yuppppppp she def has some resentment at him not growing tf up.

ooooooooh "mujhse zyaada tumhe koi pyaar nahi karega!!!!" and all. and pooja seems hella uncomfy. which is fair. these kinda statements are really not as romantic as they’re supposed to seem. they’re more a statement of ownership than love.

at this point i gotta say, i relate with pooja the most in this show so far, and i’m hella sad she gonna be dead soon.

zoya, i get your disappointment and all, but you clingy and whinyyyy af girl.

why is he shaving out in the open? do you ppl not have a bathroom?

gareebon ka varun dhawan thinks being a good husband is listening to wife complain about the naukar. cool. cool cool cool. i hate brown dudes.

gift!

damn girl, calm down. it’s a ring. not cash. i always prefer cash.

oh ho wrong size. pooja size? huhuhuhuhu.

LMAO HE’S SO UNCOMFORTABLE. YOU SHADY FUCK.

damn adi-pooja’s house is huuuuge af. like, they’re not oberoi rich, but definitely hellla fucking rich.

omnious kadamon ka sound. tension-inducing elderly male figure is making entry. is he dad or sasur????

oh this guy. shahid kapoor ka ex step-dad.

dad has Opinions™ on the commute issues of younger couple.

ok mr. hooda. HIS dad.

also, wow. another omkara callback. daddy issues and calling father mr. [surname]

wow, i clearly have “a type” when it comes to tellywood dudes, don’t i????

his mom looks just about as young as his wife, the fuck. like, at most she looks 5 years older than him.

aaaand gareebon ka varun dhawan is offffffff. never to be seen alive again, i presume.

god she clingyyyyyyy af. i don’t really like her character so far.

mmmmm hmmmmmm. love me a man in uniform.

ok he seems to be treating the plane’s PA system like some kinda radio station for himself. nope.

yeah, these fake flying scenes are weird and corny af. fwding.

ok he’s gonna go to mussoorie. because Reasons.

love zoya’s mom for promoting healthy body image. you go mom. i like you.

dad has judgy face af.

lol dadddddd hates yash and thinks he stoopid.

“aapki subhaanAllah pottery.” snort.

lol, i like the sister. she’s so fucking done with her dad’s 5 saal puraana dukhda. get over it already, dad.

dad says issue is not communal. meaning he really knows that yash is shadyyyyyyyy af.

LMAO MAN WHY AND HOW ARE DESI DADS SUCH FUCKING EXPERTS AT DESTROYING YOU WITH THE FEWEST WORDS POSSIBLE

hmmmm hint of some financial issues here also.

damn, the dad really hates yash. what does he know about him that we don’t!?!?!?! SPILL ABBU! SPILL!

ok yup the siddiquis are rich af. driver badi gaadi and all.

oooooh serendipitous meeting time.

the push up level on her bra is kinda ridic. her boobs are practically up in her nostrils.

does every art shop in the world have this obligatory 3D buddha thingy or what????

ok what is this 5 minute waste on them wandering this fucking shop fwd fwd fwd 

oh it’s pooja’s favt song too?

aaaaaaand they both picked it up.

damn boy. you married. stop giving random hottie in the local archies’ heart eyes.

lmaoooooo pack kar dijiye plz and resulting apology.

snort us par in janaaab ka bhi moohtod jawab.

lel. beautiful idiots.

lmao i appreciate his efforts.

“yeh bus ki seat hai kya jispe rumaal phenk di toh seat aapki?” “dekhiye, hum bus mein travel hi nahi karte, toh humein kaise pata hoga???”

lolololol. what logic.

arre waaaaaah. valiant effort by aditya, but zoya knows charlie uncle (and whoever jenny is) and has capitalized on that.

LMAO I LOVE HE’S SPEAKING TO CHARLIE UNCLE AS IF HE KNOWS HIM SINCE FOREVER.

damnnnnnnnn the sexual tension.

LOLOLOL WHICH IS NOW JUST REGULAR TENSION COZ HE THREW MONEY AT HER AND TOOK OFF WITH THE THING. CHOR KAHINKA.

they’re legit running all over the damn city. lord above.

what stamina these two have. jfc.

lol urdu lesson in the middle of conflict.

what’s with gulaal phenking?

oh, just distraction technique.

oh no. phone call time. oh no oh no oh no. didn’t think it would come within this ep itself.

oh yikes car ki kaaafi buriiiiiiii haaalat.

ok fuck anything else, look at this man’s cheekbones. they can cut glass. how unfair. i want. both the man and his cheekbones.

also, this guy has zero questions on why she’s being found dead in mussoorie when she said she was going to chennai? two completely different directions my man. thought you were a pilot and supposed to know where the cities are????

oh shit, gareebon ka varun dhawan DEDDDDDDDDDD.

i mean, i knew it was coming, idk why i’m so shocked.

WHY LORD WHY IS POOJA DEAD TOO? I LIKED HER THE BEST SO FARRRRRRRRR.

aaah man, their grief is hard to watch.

aaaaaaaand

lel his instant face change like BITCH WHAT WERE YOU UP TOOOOOOOO

damn aditya, you reaaaaaaaaallll quick. you just went from shock to anger stage of grief in like under 10 seconds.

even zoya be like what this dude’s deal????? at first, and then she noticed the handssssssss.

ah man my heart is breaking for her. she seems so shockeddddd and brokennnn.

notice contrast in emotions and expressions:

ok BIGGEST QUESTION: how are yash/pooja are still holding hands? like, the car fell into the khaaai, and they most probably died on impact. how the fuck did you extract bodies out of the car like THAT? (or were they pulled out alive and then held hands and proceeded to die?) EXPLAIN TO ME, SHOW. 10 points, show your work. 

oh fuck lots happening in the next ep too, from slapping to angsty grabbing to almost killing to life saving. damn. is this really a one hour show daily????? dude imma be fucking exhausted.

[riverdaleroundup]

Riverdale Roundup: Episode 2x03 “ The Watcher in the Woods”

Are you ready? ooohh ooohh ohh- I know you see me standing here-- okay i'm already off topic.

Okay so here I am. Fresh off watching the new episode of riverdale and I thought I would share my thoughts with you because my life is empty and I need something to fill my time. This is my creative outlet. Welcome to your tape? More like welcome to my blog.

Okay so we start this week's episode and Kevin is running in the woods like a thot looking for some good old gay lovin and he starts macking on this guy and i'm like who is that? Was that Dilton doiley? It kind of looked like him but a bitch is not sure.  I mean what are the odds that the gun happy leader of riverdale’s finest boy scout troop is also a first rate closet case?

BANG BANG gun shots! Kevin runs over and Midge is like freaking the fuck out. Okay is it just me or does she kind of look like Carly Rae Jepsen in a bad wig? Praise the lord that Moose is alive.  I was so sad when I thought he was dead. He's my guy. He shielded that crazy bitch from harm with his beautiful over sized body.

Now let's talk south side high: What the fuck is with this place? So there's security and metal detectors but the kid's can do straight up drugs in the hallway? I get that jingle jangle or whatever it's called basically just looks like pixie sticks but still. Also how convenient that there just happens to be a rival gang that no one has ever heard of before. Everyone was so damn concerned that the Serpents were doing all this evil shit around town but not one single person was like huh maybe it's this other gang that has strong ties to drugs and are in general just sketchy af. Also there's no wifi in the classrooms and no doors on the bathroom stalls? That sounds like my literally hell.

So this Toni Topaz gal is some artsy photographer how perfect for the revival of the red and black or the black and red or whatever it is.  How convenient. People on Instagram are all like " omg she's going to break up bughead"  and i'm like hmmmmm that sounds like it could be kind of true but also kind of fake. It just seems like such an obvious route to go with. Like oh wow Jughead is friends with a girl so clearly they’re going to fuck. It's TBD.  But also like isn't she supposed to be sexually fluid or some shit like that? Like is she going to go after Betty? Who's to say?

Also Jughead just casually getting beat up by the other gang and then telling Betty that he crashed his motorcycle. Okay for one thing Jughead you are 15. You can't just drive around sans license. I get that your girlfriend's GBF's daddy is head bitch in charge of the riverdale police but still, your family is already in deep shit with the law. I mean i don't get how his mother wasn't charged with reckless abandonment for picking the child she liked better and fleeing the state.  Also I feel like there is a clear distinction between the scraps you would get from from falling off your bike and the bruises you get  from being beaten up by a rival gang member.  Betty is no dumb bitch. Also why was Toni just casually in the trailer with them? Like are they all BFFs now? Are they going to adopt some other south side street rat and become the new core four?

On another note FREAKING CHARLES PERCY IS THE SOUTH SIDE HIGH ENGLISH TEACHER!!!!!!!!!! He faked his death at Seattle Grace Mercy West in order to move to whatever east coast state this is and work in an underprivileged high school? I like wasn't paying attention when he was first on the screen so I only heard his voice and i looked up and i was like omg that's one of those residents that died who I totes forgot about.  

Also we finally see the return of pregnant Polly. Who delivers one of the most iconic lines of the episode  " I am an unwed mother carrying my cousins babies. I am the poster child for sin"  like it's so weird to hear her say her cousin. Like they acknowledge that its incest and that Polly and Jason are related but hearing her say that I was like YIKES! Also she " called the farm" how fake does that sound? Like what kind of farm just operates as a wayward home for pregnant runaways? No farm Iwant to go to that's for sure.

Okay back to my boy Moose for a hot second. I love him. I love him so much. And he LOVES Kevin and i'm like Kevin be with him. Kevin you don't need to go sulking in the woods for a hook up. Moose is right there in all his bi sexual closeted cuteness asking you to love him. When he was like " you can come back and we could like hang out and like talk" and i'm like go to him Kevin.

Next subject on the docket is Veronica and her Daddy. Someone needs to keep a count of how many times she says Daddy in a single episode. I'm sure by the end of the season the number will be well into the thousands. Okay so she wants to have her friends over to watch " the matchlorette" like okay CW why don't you buy the rights to say normal words. This is a popular ass show I know you have the money.

" Matchlorette"

"American Excess"

" Vanity Flare"

WE SEE RIGHT THROUGH YOU WRITERS! YOU'RE NOT CLEVER.

So Daddy gives baby 15 year old Archie some fancy ass Rum and is like fight this killer with violence. What's your MO Mark? Also i H8 Hermione so much right now. She's such a Psycho and not in a hot way. Also Veronica drinking a mimosa at breakfast like it's nothing. You are 15! Which is basically 14 which is basically 12. Shut up you're like 12.  So Veronica is going to join the shady ass family business and get her hands dirty. Like okay V. Lets see how that goes.

Okay so like does Alice has her finger on the pulse of riverdale current events? The killer is so hip to the town that he's like i'll send her this creepy letter and all my  evidence knowing that she's such a stone cold bish that she'll publish it no matter what Sheriff Keller or the Mayor says.

J'adore how Cheryl was being so very me and just eavesdropping on all of Betty and Kevin's conversations. Then she was just like " I'm here to fuck shit up" and stands by smiling while watching their friendship burn in front of her. Also her comment about dark betty was iconic.

Okay now the meat and potatoes. The red circle? Really Archie? We get it you have red hair. When they were all shirtless at end with the red hoods I was like okay wow this is happening. Also how very Liam Neeson was that ending part when he got really close to the camera and was  like " we will find you and we will end you" and I was like Archie you are 15. I don't know how I feel about the new Reggie yet. He's very active in these episodes now.  Okay also what was that BS with Ethel and the van? Was she just being a paranoid bish? For one when there's a murderer on the loose don't walk alone at night. Two: black hood is after sinners and Ethel seems like she goes to church on sundays and has never even said the word shit. She wears headbands with bows on them for Christ sake.  

Catch my thoughts next Thursday,

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: this is why i don't wear shoes Ali: i have lost one??? Ali: rescue it if you see it Carly: what do they look like Ali: just a kinda tan sandal thing Ali: just a penneys special so not the end of the world, should chuck the other one so someone can have the pair Carly: come & bring me food & then youll be here to reunite them Carly: but yea k will lean out my door & see if its there Ali: love the enthusiasm, babe 😜 Ali: can feel your come down from here Carly: dont barely remember the come up Carly: wtf happened last night Ali: not in a much better position myself but uhm Ali: mayhem, that's for sure Ali: i think you might've gone home with the wrong cousin Carly: shit Carly: my bad Carly: better read my txts Carly: who did you go w ? Ali: didn't go that far with anyone Ali: 💍 remember and such a 😇 Ali: ronan was in a mard though and i weren't up for listening to that so 🤷 Carly: aw Carly: sorry baby i'll calm him down Ali: it's chill 😂 bless him Ali: no need on my account tho i'm sure he'd be down, despite protests otherwise Carly: my inbox is Carly: cba w this rn Ali: oh baby, want a bacon sarnie and a secretary? Carly: yea Carly: gonna throw my phone w your shoe Ali: i woke up to a mystery dickpic on my phone Ali: is it rude to ask which one it belongs to because lads, sorry, not that memorable that i'm picking it out of a line-up Ali: you'll know, been more recent, i'll come over with food and lucozade for real and ruin your day with that lovely image and the actually rather creative sexts that went with it Ali: 10/10 for effort, sir Carly: cant put it on the cv or school report but my memory for 'em is good Carly: if ive seen it i'll id it Carly: ill laff if its the large ginge cousin whose name i never got Carly: sounded like a cough Ali: that's a talent and if the man can't see that, fuck him Ali: and his job in tescos, like Ali: i mean, shouldn't have a preference but i hope not 😂 Ali: soz honey but Carly: thanks baby Carly: I hope its that token english Carly: he was fit Ali: can reply if you like Ali: worse ways to waste a sunday morning than messing with boys Ali: sounding like a priest Ali: oops Carly: ha Carly: i found some fucking funny vids of us so maybe the phone shouldnt go out window before youve had a look Ali: yes, i need to see that Carly: [sends her fave of the vids] Ali: aww Ali: we're fun drunks Ali: love that for us Carly: yea Carly: im a messy bitch tho Carly: no wonder i went w the hero cousin Ali: meh, things happen at parties, everyone knows that Ali: not like you're proper attached is it Ali: though he's gonna be annoying now probs but day in the life when you're irresistible, yeah? Carly: youd know babe Carly: he wont be on site long never is Carly: so idc Carly: saved me for a nite boy youre welcome Ali: duh Ali: hottest couple in town Ali: one for the wank bank anyway Carly: yea & he is fit Carly: give him that Carly: esp when i dont understand what hes saying Ali: the best kind Ali: a boy you don't have to speak to 😜 Ali: if that's all it takes like, whip out the Gaeilge Carly: youve got the giggles but yea Carly: true Carly: but on site id just have all the oldies chatting at me if i could Carly: not trying to make them go weak Ali: they ain't daddies? boo 😥 Carly: some got many kids but thats it Carly: say something to me then Ali: [sends voice memo, probably has dirty words she'd recognise from site life and lots of loling] Carly: k Carly: so hot Carly: if your gf is mad at me for stealing you last nite you can smooth things over w her like that Ali: might have to Ali: though it ain't you she's 😤 with Ali: poor ronan, shoulda done more than snog him if she comes for him, not even worth it for that Carly: ill protect him when he lets me back near Carly: cant stay mad at this Carly: sure your girls the same Ali: She's mad 24/7 babe, just gotta hold on, like 😂 Ali: we want different things now but that's not a convo for this morning like jesus Carly: whos got the energy Carly: cba w angry Carly: yea you want a sarnie Ali: exactly, and i wanted to have fun last night but may as well have said i want his dick in or around my mouth k bye babe Carly: ha Carly: that would be fun tho Ali: tell that to past you, dashing his threesome dreams like 🤷💔 Carly: still time Ali: not me you need to promise baby Carly: yea but id rather talk to you Ali: 💚 Ali: you cute Carly: all you Carly: how you look so good coming from band? wtf Ali: psh please Ali: it was all about you 🙇 Carly: if that was true why is every memory i got from last nite just you Carly: facts Ali: had to get you away from that mirror somehow, like 😉 Ali: it was fun Carly: ha Carly: cuz your talents got me like Carly: yea it was Ali: helps when the canvas already beautiful babe Carly: aw Carly: youre sweet Ali: 🍓 Carly: gonna make me cry Ali: don't cry lil one Ali: the bacon is coming Ali: got roped into doing a shady kid swap, where is my ma, take this demon child Carly: you can bring him if you want Carly: ill put clothes on before Ali: cockblocked again 😉 Ali: nah, he needs to go get shoes Ali: ironically and unlucky, twat Carly: what size is he Carly: i can ask around when i look for yours Carly: lads flog everything and anything here on sundays Ali: his feet are big man Ali: he's only little but he's lanky af, unlike me Ali: that's fun tho Ali: imma go shopping Carly: aw Carly: yea wish i was taller Carly: ffs ma and da Ali: literally Ali: least neither of my sisters are model tall or i'd be more raging Ali: we make it work, babe Carly: & i dont have any sisters Carly: well done on that one tho ma & da Ali: speak for yourself Ali: i'm gutted Carly: oww Carly: trying to replace me like the vows were no thing Ali: you know you're my one and only Ali: but a woman got needs Carly: thats what your gf is for Carly: no Ali: yeah but i'm allowed wishful thinking too Ali: damn Carly: ive given you the mental image of me naked Carly: what more you need Ali: are you jealous of your hypothetical sister? Carly: yea if you like her more Ali: aw baby, 'course not Ali: she's a ride, yeah, but bit of a bitch too, like Carly: ha Carly: takes after our ma like Ali: sadly, straighter than you Ali: 👎 Carly: like theres a ranking Carly: just straight or not yea Ali: I mean, it is a scale but I'm not gonna try and bond with your Ma giving her the test for it, like Ali: could we tie her down for a sec, obvs Carly: hit her when shes washing up Carly: takes long Ali: okay, i'll dry 😉 Ali: what an offer Carly: trying to make me vom now Carly: take crying or blushing over Ali: soz babe Carly: her & my da dont fuck but still dont reckon youre her type Ali: don't know what's worse, that, or knowing they do Carly: im good w them not Carly: sound carries Carly: no secrets in the caravan Ali: sure there's a toilet block they could go to Ali: keeping it sexy Carly: sure my da's there doing his cry wank Carly: while my ma checks the talent Carly: we got that to look forward to in our marriage in a few years Ali: who's scouting who's cranking Ali: because frankly, i refuse either Carly: im the biggest slag so probs me Carly: sorry Ali: and I'm not Ali: igloo sisters how many times now?! 😂 Carly: ha Carly: but youre loyal Carly: me and my ma dont kno the meaning like Ali: am i Ali: you miss the part when i got on ronan Carly: o yea Carly: i forgot Ali: idk what i'm gonna do about that Ali: instant gameover but its literally so irrelevant Carly: hes a ride Carly: you should be excused for it Ali: she's a 6 on that scale, yeah, massive gay Ali: so she ain't seeing that, never mind the other shit Carly: shit yea Carly: dont tell her Ali: does that make me the worst? Ali: i should hm Carly: hes not gonna speak to her Carly: and if he brags you can call it that Ali: Yeah Ali: I don't know Carly: its that or tell her Carly: & say youre sorry Carly: we were all wasted Carly: not like you have feelings for him Ali: You're right, obviously Ali: like that's the truth but yeah Ali: might leave it unless I need to go there Ali: soz God, swing by confession later Carly: tell her youre a bi cliche Carly: she'd love it Carly: use the scale Ali: she would tho Ali: validate everything she's ever sneaky or not so thought about me Ali: soz, i need a constant stream of p n v or i die Carly: a girl has needs Carly: what am i a 1? Ali: its like dis Ali: 1- all straight 2- mostly straight but lil gay 3- equal/bi 4- mostly gay but still lil into opposite 5- total gay Ali: but not gonna resist the urge to tell you you a 10 Carly: 🥇 Carly: i like that you're 3 tho. 3's a lucky number Ali: and a magic one 🔮 Carly: yea cuz youre magical Ali: believe it baby Carly: i do Ali: right, finally leaving, be like 10 Ali: doing the opposite to a walk of shame rn, strutting back in like what's good Carly: you gotta Carly: own it baby Carly: havent found your shoe tho sorry Carly: maybe ronan took it cuz he loves you so bad Ali: 😂 oh my god Ali: like a horny puppy Carly: yea Carly: building a shrine to you rn probs Ali: or he wanna play cinderella Ali: such a ridiculous fairytale, as far as they go Carly: how wasted was the prince that he cant remember what she looks like Carly: k been there but not trying to wife anyone Ali: right?! also, sure plenty of bitches a size 5, like??? Ali: was it a magic shoe Ali: no explanation, frankly Carly: yea like me and you have the same size Carly: ill take your prince for a ride bitch Ali: 😂 Ali: he cool with that Ali: that's the tea Ali: boy gives no fucks, long as it ain't a man in drag Carly: he hasnt met your brother tho Carly: boy looks good Ali: eww Ali: stop that thought right there Carly: dont get jealous Carly: not gonna go there Ali: not jealous, but repulsed 😷 Carly: k babe Carly: if you say so Ali: trust, you wanna see jealous you'll see it soon enough if you go there Ali: 😂 bea don't fuck about Carly: have to go for one of your other hot brothers Ali: trying be my sister in law and wife Ali: kickin it country Carly: you kno Carly: been on site too long Ali: forreal, not gotta hang with the traveller lads that hard baby Carly: after last nite not gonna be hanging w them for a while Ali: let 'em fight it out amongst themselves Ali: defs for the best Carly: yea Carly: hide w me babe Carly: gonna be so bored Ali: gonna Ali: i'll peep their wares another day Ali: not a euphemism Carly: sounds dirty tho Ali: yeah, regretted it as i said it but hey Ali: love me a sale and a gypsy boy Carly: no regrets boo Carly: they love you too Carly: esp whoever send the dick pic Ali: the real mystery Ali: soz everyone else with your drama but we gotta know Carly: i do need to be knowing Carly: thats my wife lads Ali: awh you gonna defend my honour n delicate sensibilities Carly: yea Carly: youre an angel Ali: you're so cute Carly: its you Carly: my parents came back Carly: gonna have to run Ali: oh no i am en route Ali: where you going boo Carly: i'll catch you and we can find somewhere theyre not Carly: ha church Carly: can you eat there cuz im not looking to die for jesus Ali: yeah for sure, not in the pews like its the cinema, like Ali: can go park if you wanna Ali: or up the mountain if you can hack it, like Carly: youre so smart Carly: like your mouth Carly: but yea Carly: date time Ali: awh yeah Ali: this picnic ain't goals i'm so sorry babe Ali: least the weather's looking up Carly: idc Carly: get to be w my boo Ali: 😍 Carly: i look crazy Carly: havent got dressed faster w out getting fucked before since idc Carly: idk Ali: i like crazy Ali: and beside me you'll probs look totally normal 😉 Carly: you look hot every day baby Carly: facts Ali: all these compliments got me feeling 🔥 obvs Carly: thats how i want it Ali: gonna have you flying high too Ali: top of the world, baby Carly: aw Carly: whats in the food like Ali: 😂 Ali: just faith n trust n pixiedust, of course Carly: you can snort pixiedust yea? Carly: k Ali: you gon' be mad when i've got nothing but sandwiches and half a donut Carly: nah Carly: cant be mad at you Carly: too cute Ali: and donuts are life Carly: true

[terraaurea]

DSOD Differences between ENG and JP

These are just my observations from watching the DSOD movie in English twice, then once in Japanese (Here’s where I watched the sub, so credit the fan subber! Also remember to support the official release of the JP with subs when it is fully available! -- https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B3pKUWJ9VACyR2RueEN0ZS15R0k/view ). Feel free to add stuff/your own thoughts. I don’t know Japanese, so I’m going off the fan-sub. 

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT, DUH.

·         Yugi's not like "I wish I could have told him what he meant to me" he's just like "we're in our own worlds now..."

·         Omfg the short bully guy has a REALLY DEEP VOICE I love it

·         and he's like to Aigami "Well, you are CUTE..."

·         He's like "I'm gonna make you famous...the theme this time around...IS PAIN HAHA"

·         I forgot that Kaiba calls Atem ‘Yugi’ in the JP

·         "Leaving Yugi behind like a COWARD and vanishing without a trace made it difficult to track you down..." (In the Cathedral)

·         ORE NO TAURN

·         I forgot that the music from the jp is pretty cool--very orchestral--rather than GUITAR RIFFS

·         Already makes more sense with the duels—they mention sacrificing monsters more often thank god

·         The mirror absorbs neo 3 blue eyes whatshisfuck and sends it back at Kaiba. It doesn't deflect it and then send a new attack like the dub implies

·         Kaiba doesn't mention any coiffed hair but says "I even replicated his provoking personality"

·         Jounouchi, you're fired! Instead of NO CLOWNING AROUND

·         More explanation about the Plana/Planners--ok so 7 items found, Pharoah goes back home, and it opens up that new dimension where they've gotta keep the order or something like that

·         They want to get rid of the old world to make room for a new order? And they gotta eradicate evil?

·         "We've been waiting for you" instead of "You've graced us with yer presence sIR"

·         Still has the "Ok but it took Yugi 8 years..." "Yeah, but Yugi has the brain of a child" KAIBA SAVAGE

·         Kaiba's jp voice is so much more intimidating just a reminder

·         "Even though I didn't register my deck or duel disk anywhere, you still knew where I was. You're quite the control freak, aren't you?" - Diva

·         "I hate dangerous murderers like you, you see...so I think I'll need to erase you from this dimension." -Diva, with gun at back

·         They're actually talking about the connection between consciousnesses. Which relates to that 2 chapter prequel manga (Transcend Game).

·         Diva's like "Kaiba, you know all about the human consciousness, don't you? Everything done in this world is done by the unconscious mind...all of which are linked together...even you, the dictator of this city, are powerless to control the consciousnessesses of all of Domino…let alone the world."

·         I’m not going to bother spelling consciousness right anymore

·         Because Kaiba had to use the consciousnessess of all the children combined playing his VR prototype to catapult himself up into the afterlife the first time in the manga

·         So to keep everything in order you need those links to be balanced, too.

·         It’s in the ENG too but if you watch the children that Diva summons are all connected with these golden darting lines and now that makes more sense THX

·         He's borrowing the power of other people's consciousnesses (all those children) in order to have enough energy to wield his powers by using the cube

·         So in the other dimension that he sends the gunman, the gunman is no longer connected to the consciousnesses of everyone else in the world anymore

·         In the JP then too Diva explains that he is using the power of the Plana, but also the Plana's Mind, which makes the control of his consciousness (and by extension the links to everyone else) 7x stronger than everyone else's

·         Instead of saying "NOT SO FAST/etc." when he's not disappearing into the other dimension, Kaiba goes "DON'T WORRY, MOKUBA” BIG BRO IS HERE FOR U AND DON’T YOU FORGET IT

·         So the reason why the power didn't send Kaiba to the other dimension is because his ego is SO INFLATED and thus his consciousness and intellect are so great that he's on par with Diva's Plana Mind

·         With his duel disk connected to his brain--which if you remember is connected to that Cloud Network--he's got enough connections with other consciousnesses in the cloud to combat Diva's powers??? I think

·         "Kisama no TURN..." sounds so cool like damn

·         JP also explains why he can summon shittons of blue eyes

·         JP explains the spell cards better

·         I think they left out the monster noises/screams in the ENG? Someone should confirm that for me

·         "I was the one who had to bury Yugi, no, Atem inside of me. His ghost continues to wander in my unfulfilled consciousness. Yugi!" – Kaiba

·         The eng music slightly is based off the jp music but with 10x more guitar riffs and zero chill

·         As for why the fuck he could summon Obelisk—in the JPDiva says there's residual energy left in that place due to it being where the Pharaoh left the world, and that Kaiba must have picked up on it. And Diva says that Obelisk is only a servant to the pharaoh. I think Diva missed that whole Battle City thing tho and doesn't realize that other people were wielding the god cards too

·         Still got "IT'S NOT A MONSTER. IT'S A GOD."

·         No "I NEED TISSUEEEEES" thx

·         Still got "Pharaoh can't come back if we get rid of his vessel" gotta kill Yugi

·         The big duel tournie takes place at Kaibaland

·         To put the puzzle back together quickly he needed his machine to be in space to utilize zero gravity—still extra

·         "Enough of the boring Flattery. // My Apologies, Mr. Kaiba" No "I'm programed to remind you of your genius" darn

·         Yugi says he's keeping the Dark Magician in his deck and is like "I wonder what Aigami's gonna use in his deck" instead of "You got me out of a lot of jams!" Suggesting Yugi actually knows how to fucking build a deck wow shocker

·         Shadi was supposed to collect all 7 items so he could send Pharaoh back to deadland and Yugi was a necessary vessel that had to have been chosen to help the Pharaoh get there out of the puzzle and shit

·         Yugi shares a consciousness wavelength with the Plana people because welp he let the pharaoh live in his bod

·         Instead of Joey just losing his memories in the dimension it's more him struggling to find out what's real and what's fake because he also can’t trust his own memories. And the idea is that he's not connected to the consciousness of the rest of the world so he's only seeing what he has ever seen. But if he does forget things then he does lose everything because he's relying solely on his own consciousness

·         Shadi's eng voice is VERY similar to his jp voice nice

·         Diva asks about rulers and how they aren't afraid because they have everything and never have anything taken from them. And so Shadi is like "Yeah but then they take everyone from others"--makes sense given that Diva tries to control everything so that he loses nothing. No talk about how easily manipulated children are like in the ENG. Just talk about power/loss/fear and loss/loss and fear

·         Shadi says an evil thing lives in the ring and has already chosen a master, and that you have to surpass a trial to be able to wear it. Obviously that doesn't end well for him.

·         3 items are for justice, 3 have evil presences inside them, millennium puzzle has both

·         Shadi says that there will be a young boy that will become the vessel for the pharaoh, and then says that he's the same as them (the Plana children--meaning he's probably just got strong connection powers or whatever/spiritual powers)

·         "Oh, did he finally croak? You guys are an eyesore" -Yami!Bakura

·         "I'm going to paint this world in darkness" – Yami!Bakura

·         Diva doesn't know that Bakura doesn't have evil dickmix in his blood anymore

·         "But...I killed someone very special to you, didn't I?" -Bakura. No "I also lost someone very important to me that day..." though obvs his dad is dead AF

·         Joey was able to come out of the dimension because his bonds with his buds surpass dimensions--which is fucking intense given that going to a different dimension is supposed to prevent that in the first place friendship is sTRONG

·         No "My cardio stinks", just "Bakura-kun..."

·         Kaiba's under the impression that the afterlife is still connected to the puzzle--sorry Kaiba

·         He really wants to resurrect pharaoh to face him again welp

·         Also Mokuba isn't like "HEY YUGI, LOOKIN GOOD!" He's like "Hey Yugi! We've already got the game shop covered for you!" So that's nice. No worries about G-PA getting snatched in the meantime

·         Diva says even with Kaiba's tech it's impossible for them to go into another dimension (inside of the cube to get the puzzle piece)--obvs Kaiba's not gonna be havin that later...

·         Your body is a flesh prison for your soul and when you die it's free but until then you're stuck in flesh prison and even when you win murderous wars and fight needlessly you are still in yer flesh prison.

·         So through Kaiba's duel disk he wants to allow people to go beyond the flesh prison to eliminate language/barriers/need for fighting/etc.

·         So it's a lot more than just "PLAY MY CHILDREN'S CARD GAME"

·         he legit says flesh prison

·         Shadi's always been able to go through dimensions as a priest of the Pharaoh?

·         Shit. "Yugi, I'll remind you, that you're just a vessel! -Kaiba

·         "It looks like you won't summon the pharaoh...until I duel you into submission!" Ok kaiba

·         No lemons being sour jokes

·         No "You really hate dragons...don't you?"

·         Kaiba does have a very dramatic line about Deep Eyes coming to live from the blue abyss

·         "No you gotta let him go" but "This is the reality...he's no longer in there..." Yugi's like "I've accepted it and you gotta accept it" but nah

·         But yeah the idea was to open a new dimension and drag the world into it with the 8th millennium item (cube).

·         But, if you bring it into a dark world like Diva was going to, it would only bring the chosen ones into the new dimension, eliminating everyone else

·         Still says "Kaiba, why? // Because of him. Yugi (the pharaoh)"

·         Still has "Call him." But also has "Call him to you."

·         Yugi just says "Draw...I'm sorry...everyone..." because there's no heart of the cards bullshit in the jp. So Yugi is convinced that he's failed instead of hoping in cards

·         No epic music when Atem comes back so it's definitely more unsettling. Kind of underwhelming but makes it weightless. Which I can appreciate because it's basically like "Diva literally has so little power that there doesn't even need to be epic music because Yami just wipes the fucking floor with him"

·         Instead of saying "DID HE ASK ABOUT ME?" Joey says "I saw him too!" And Yugi goes "I knew it!" So Atem did pay him a visit to get him to come out of the weird dimension. That’s cool

·         "So he did really come here then, Yugi." - Kaiba

·         "I had all but given up, Kaiba. But you still believed."

·         "I don't know about that. Farewell, Yugi. You were indeed a proud duelist." - Kaiba

·         So instead of being like "I got my thing with the pharaoh, bitch. And you got yours." it's more like hey we saved the world together, and I recognize you as a good, strong dude. We can be 'friends' now…in Kaiba's own way

·         "Kaiba, I really have to thank you." -Yugi

·         Mokuba’s like "Are you sure you want to do this?"And Kaiba says, "Once this is completed. It will create a new type of duel as we know it."Then Mokuba does say that this new prototype using the dimension emulator (different than the VR used earlier) is too dangerous.

·         Kaiba isn't like "I leave everything to you...Mokuba..." He's like "Watch over everything while I'm away." Implying he plans on coming back.

·         Thus this version of the movie is definitely less "KAIBA HAS NO CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!! BATTLE PHARAOH ANYWAY" It's a lot more that he develops even further in his technological goals. So he still wants to battle the pharaoh but he's using him more as a guinea pig for testing his transdimensional duel system rather than saying "fuck everything I'm gonna go duel dead people ANYWAY BECAUSE I'M AN EGOTISTICAL ASS” tho maybe he still wants some pharaoh dick who knows

[effervescentmind]

Entry 41b: 06.05.20 @ 5:22 p.m.

Like I mentioned in part A, I was having an emotional meltdown Sunday or Monday. My best friend of almost eleven years has been acting stupid and selfishly. I have been battling with cutting her off for months and finally did Wednesday. 

The week prior, we had planned to meet up with her mother and go out for lunch to discuss the baby shower plans. The night before we were supposed to do it, my friend texted me that he baby father wanted to help plan the shower. This highly annoyed me but I didn’t say anything because I didn’t have a right to deny him. The next day comes and she picked me up, with him driving, and we did a few errands before going back to their apartment. When we arrived, her mother was in the parking lot waiting for us. They argued a little because she had been waiting for over an hour for her. Honestly, she didn’t have a reason to be mad because she arrived an hour earlier than she was told to come. I did my best to diffuse the situation and calm her down. As we walked from the parking lot to the door of the apartment building, there were some homeless people and shady looking characters hanging around outside. I didn’t like it but kept my thoughts to myself. When we get inside there was a security officer and a front desk that requires you to sign in with your I.D. While waiting for a elevator up, I noticed behind us was a door to the stairwell. It reeked of piss and confirmed the stories of people peeing in there. Eventually the elevator came, and we went up to the floor. 

Their apartment was organized, heavily decorated and small. I and my friend’s mother sat on the couch while my friend was in a chair by her mother. We caught up a little and then started having girl talk about her parents’ relationship. I won’t divulge any details, but it was a moment of love and heartache. We were interrupted by the baby father who felt the need to talk about his apartment. He was saying how he knew it was not the best place, but it was the inside that counted and that they were moving next year. He then moved on to speak on how he knew we didnt like him and that he didnt know what my friend had told us but he really did love her and that he was doing his best for her. He wanted us to be cool, lean on each other and talk since we were “all family now”. I saw it as his insecurity coming out, but I was polite and we continued on. 

I started the conversation by focusing on the baby shower and my friend’s mother began telling us about the location at a park. We talked about a theme a little bit and the baby father was putting his opinions in. It was fine until he started saying he didn’t want to be outside all day. He was complaining about not wanting it to be an all-day affair and that he would probably leave early. I was angered not only for the obvious reason of him not caring enough but also because I knew what he was doing. He wanted to leave with her car so he could go fuck around with some girl or something he shouldn’t be doing. So I jumped in and said that was fine and that he and I could ride back to the apartment and I would take the car back to the park so my friend could leave when she was ready. He kept pushing for his way and I held my ground because I knew it was what she wanted and that she wouldn’t stick up for herself. He got angry and started arguing and yelling at me. I yelled back and it turned into a whole fight. He started coming for my character and talking shit about me. I already hated him, so I was ready to fight and make him feel like shit. My friend and her mother were defending me while trying to calm us down.

Eventually I stopped and he started yelling at my friend and telling her that she was letting me disrespect him in his house, that she wasn’t loyal and she needed to stand up to me. I started making comments and he ignored me but kept talking shit to her. She was crying and her mom was trying to get me to stop talking. Everything that came out of his mouth was bullshit and hurtful towards her. He even had the nerve to say that he could have left her. He said it to her face four different times, and it astounded me that it wasn’t enough for her to start yelling at him and stick up for herself. He was emotionally abusing her right in front of her family and it wasn’t enough for her to leave him. I was furious with what a coward she was. This wasn’t her. She is a bossy, selfish, bitch and she was letting some child treat her like shit and make her cry. Pathetic and unbelievable. They both went into the room and continued their talking meanwhile my friend’s mother and I talked and cried about her. All this started not even an hour into us being there. I couldn’t believe it. I knew they fought, and he was horrible but I didn’t think he would be this way in front of people. I just couldn’t believe she was with someone that openly abuses and shoots her down. 

When they finished, they came out and things continued like nothing happened. The food we had ordered arrived and we began planning again. The baby father touched my back (I wanted to stab him for it) and gave me some stupid half ass apology. He also said he was sorry for how things went and that he lost his cool, but I was just a “spicy meatball”. Man, I wanted to slap him so bad, but I held it in and continued.

The rest of our time there, we planned, and he was heavily involved. He commented on everything and all that came out of his mouth sounded ignorant af. He literally is dumber than a ton of bricks. He also has no filter and doesn’t know how to respect elders. A few of the things he said were things you don’t say in front of other woman and/or adults and it didn’t phase him that the grandmother of his future son was in the room. My friend looked at me and laughed, trying to cover up the things he said while embarrassment clouded her eyes. I laughed on the inside. Before I was angry and sad for her but now, I was looking at her like she was a clown. For someone that hates when men text her grammatically incorrect sentences, she was dating a moron that spewed garbage from his mouth. She really let herself go. She doesn’t know who she is anymore, and she let a boy that doesn’t fucking love her get her pregnant and illegally drive her car. Unbelievable. 

Around five pm, her mother decided it was time to go home. We walked her to the car and hit the road. The three of us went to target and find my friend a dress for the shower, then they ordered food from Hooter’s that needed to be picked up. After, they drove towards my apartment and I filled their tank before they dropped me off. 

When I got inside, my mother was already home from work. She asked me how my day was, and I told her it was horrible. I then vented and cried and yelled. I was filled with so many emotions and stress. I couldn’t stop talking about it. I didn’t sleep that night either because my mind was racing. 

The next day, my friend had an ultrasound and she told me that the doctor was thinking of inducing her. The baby isn’t growing fast enough and he believed that it would have a better chance of growing faster outside of the uterus. I was so angry and didn’t know what to say. This was her fault! She smoked weed the whole pregnancy and ate crap. The baby’s health was never a priority to her. I lost it! I messaged her mom about how I felt. Told her I was sorry, but I was done and would not be doing the baby shower. I wasn’t excited anymore and my friend was selfish, and she needed to grow up. Told her the fight the day before was ridiculous and I couldn’t take it anymore. I wasn’t going to be a shoulder to cry on for someone that doesn’t want to do better for herself. She said that she and her husband understood and then I proceeded to block my friend on all platforms. I didn’t feel I owed her an explanation when I’ve been telling her about him over and over and begging her to stick up for herself.  

She did reach out to me again (my friend’s mom) the next day after my friend started crying and claiming that I abandoned her and tried to make me feel bad. I held my ground and she came back to reality. She knew I was right. She felt the same way too and was considering not talking to her daughter as well.

It’s hard to pull away when you love someone so much and they are destroying themselves. You want to help but some people don’t want to be helped. They just sit in their shit and nothing progresses. I can’t deal with it. It has been years of watching her go in and out of the same stupid cycle and hurting innocent people along the way. It’s time for me to let go and focus on myself. Friends come and go and I will have better ones in the future if I stick to my path and do what’s right for me.

[ebonyeagle]

DETROIT DIARY

Did this with Mankind Divided and thought it could be fun to do again! I’ve gone through this game twice already with friends (Both Pacifist runs) so I’m quite familiar with that part of the story. What I do want to explore now is all the bad choices which I’m an expert in (at least in real life) so let’s see where this adventure will go! Have fun guessing what scenarios I’m playing

NO NONSENSE, SAVE THE FISH

Aquarium must be a Heavy Rain throw back

“My name is Connor, I’m the android send by Cyberlife”

Connor, you know I love you but I’ll throw you off this building for fun, no hard feelings

Weee Todd time, I can’t wait to punch him. Or shoot. Or whatever it is you can

Hmmm this reminds me of something but I can’t put my finger on it

Wow, littering asshole! Pick that one up right now you lazy fuck

Let’s try and avoid that angry mop this time

Wow, getting mad at the Roomba now as well? Poor Roomba, it did nothing wrong 8C

Fuck this shit

Y ARE THERE DRUGS IN THE WASHING POWDER THAT NASTY LEARN TO HIDE STUFF  PROPERLY

Gun and anti-depressants, we all know what a good combo that is

I hope this means what I think it does

STOP! But can we all just take a moment to appreciate how beautiful the soundtrack is for this game?! <3

ANDROID BIRDS ANDROID BIRDS

Speed chess, is that an actual thing??

Okay, but how fun could it be if you could fuck up the painting quick time event and paint like, a blob or a stick figure!?

COOKIECUT

Alright, I like Hank and Connors relationship and it’s gonna be weird to knock it down in hostile territory

Oh, that’s a valid point. Not only are you a good boi, you are an expensive AF boi as well. Good luck paying the bill, Hank

ATMOSPHERE! RAIN! LIGHTNING!

Stormy night! Been looking forward to replay this; what other outcomes are there!?

Gonna move, bitch

As a good American, let’s grab the gun first

GODDAMMIT KARA Y DIDN’T U JUST SHOOT!? U HAD ONE FUCKING JOB

….Well, that was anti-climatic….

Seen both outcomes for this but for the sake fucking up the relationship with Carl  - PUSH!

MOVE, I GOT THE DADDY PANTS ON

STRESS, SHOOTING, DEATH

Would have loved to try the Motel but for the sake of Connor and Ralph, CREEPY HOUSE

Mud intensifies

Jayden did that much better, Markus

OMG HE’S SO CUTE I CAN’T EVEN!

Only thing here is trying to be douchebag towards Gavin?  -Did not go as planned, I am disappointed ;C

Sorry Connor but I am doing this for the lols

Ralph just needs a hug :C

THIS OST IS NICE

Run Kara run, I have much more fun stuff planned for you guys! I think. Actually, I don’t know what to do with you yet.

FUCK THIS PART

Wow, this scene is so much shorter now lol

Hmmm had hoped for some variation in the interactions here :/

Birds birds birds

Do we save or do we not? Let’s do none of it

This is just sad

Always trust a shady dude named Zlatko

is it actually possible to escape the reset? It is but gotta be quick!

Wow, so much shit is stored here - is that a cyborg polar bear???

I just ripped a dude’s heart out :D

Does that make me a murderer? Oh wait already killed Todd! I’m a good mother! Be proud of me Alice 

What do I want? Saving my child from a psychopathic mad man as time is running out! When do I want to do it? Just after I’ve read these magazines and watched TV

I wanna get Alice and Kara killed here, science you know

When you wanna kill your character but you are SAVED BY A GODDAMN POLAR BEAR

I find the doorbell hilarious - my humor is beyond salvation

The slap as well… I need help

Whatever, just kill the guy

Shooting people in the back since 2k38, true hero

No differences really but whatever, that merry-go-round scene is beautiful

This scenery is beautiful as well T_T I live for the snow in this game. And headshots  

Markus, this is Adam calling, he wants his coat and fashion style back

TRUMP

That was sarcasm, Connor. Know where to stick it?

Not much new stuff here really but for the sake of the graveyard, let’s do this

I feel this would have worked much better in the previous run

this is just sad

HELLO POLICEMAN

Hide evidence? Nah fuck it, let’s see what happens!

Oh, I got Luther murdered SORRY ALICE

I’m gonna burn this place to the ground

VIOLENCE

I guess the true way to go is pacifist but damn, violence just suits Markus so much better

Okay this relationship thing is getting painful :C

Hmmmmmm

VIOLENCE! I like this Markus much better!

I think North is pissed

Fuck u North

I’m going South

No, wait Hank D:

OH MY GOD HE ACTUALLY SAID BROMANCE AND THAT FUCKING SMILE

Okay this is so messed up but badass as well  

Oh, well fuck you too!!

….Oh….

Oh, so Lucy is Luther’s stand in! Hmmm liked Luther better here, sounds weird with her

Okay I lowkey hope MB will make a Detroit collection as they did with Deus Ex!  Who am I kidding, I’ll never be able to afford anything… RIP Hengsha-dream still crying for you

Lol, I don’t even have the deviant option

This is like an episode of Game of Thrones

But at least my bromance with Simon is evolving… I think?

Hmmmmm

I’m a horrible human being but my Markus is anger Markus

Bye Carl

Oh

:CCCCCCCCC

T_T T_T T_T

WHY!?

Okay, revolution Markus is sooo much cooler than pacifist Markus!

DO YOU HEAR THE PEOPLE SING?

I don’t remember your name but killing you + your henchmen was awesome!

This is so messed up

PRESS X TO ALICE!!!!!!!!!!!!

I SHOULD FEEL BAD FOR LAUGHING

Oh hi Ralph, fancy meeting you here!

Taking control of ma boi because fuck you guys!

So I know successfully hitting all the buttons will result in headshotting Markus but I accidentally missed some and that was extra fun!!! I got to rip off his arm and break his neck :DDD And of course shoot him in the head for a good measure :DD I’m enjoying this way too much….. halp

Hmmm picking you Ralph because character development!

What a sad sad scenery…. I can’t imagine what it would feel like to be tossed out like garbage

Wow wow something is wrong with your face!! And what’s up with that high collar thing!? This looks weird, please go away you are not my Connor!!

Okay so to sum it up:

I made Markus die hated and cursed by basically everyone including teammates and Jericho. Deliberately killed Carl, Josh, North, Simon and half of Jericho because I’m an angry ball of vengeance. 

Kara tried her best to be a good mum but kinda fucked it up and got Luther killed. Left alone with Alice as the sole survivors in a massgrave knowing she had to let friend die in order to escape.

Connor was cold AF, made Hank commit suicide and killed everything in the name of Cyberlife only to be tossed out like garbage in the end.

All in all, I would say I got a pretty good ending, 10/10 :DDDD

[ruiningvoldemortday]

GoF Chapter 30- The Pensieve

- Harry telling it like it is and subtly calling Fudge on his fantastic racism :D - Harry taking note of all the stuff in Dumbledore’s office just reads like “THIS IS IMPORTANT” - I’m glad he’s learned not to just go sticking your hand in things.  Poking it with your wand might, however, be just as stupid. - “Dumbledore wouldn’t ignore him like that” oh hon - That chained chair is creepy as hell - Even in a courtroom Moody is a badass - Dumbledore knows what’s up regarding the dementors. Why WOULD the Ministry think such horrible things are in their control? - Karkaroff is a kiss-ass and Moody is a delight - Heyyyy Karkaroff you did a good! :D - I will defend my position to the death: not being a Death Eater and playing double agent does not make Snape a fucking hero - Moody gives absolutely zero fucks when sassing the defendants and it makes me really happy - Even in the real world, being sufficiently famous gets you off on all kinds of charges.  Sigh. - But no time to be mad because MY GIRL HAS ARRIVED ON THE SCENE!!! - “sitting in the chained chair as if it were a throne” MY DARK QUEEN. - I think this is the only time we ever actually see Rodolphus and Rabastan. - Barty Jr. is sure freaking out a lot for one of the proudest and most loyal Death Eaters - Also I love David Tennant as much as the next person but “late teens”, “straw-colored hair”, and “freckled skin” don’t exactly bring him to mind. - Crouch is a horrible person - Barty Jr. is also a horrible person.  But that’s beside the point.  This kind of heartlessness directed towards his own son is painful to read. - And Bellatrix proves herself to be very scary and easily the most dedicated Death Eater and her shouting that she’s just biding her time in Azkaban is just chilling and GOD I LOVE HER SO MUCH. - SO MUCH. - Jesus Christ Crouch - Harry you are a nosy shit. - “I simply have too many thoughts and memories crammed into my mind.”  Harry “couldn’t truthfully say he had ever felt anything of the sort.”  I could say a whole lot of things about that.  I really could. - Viewing memories from an outside perspective sounds amazing and useful and I wish I could do that - “we should exercise caution with our curiosity” and not stick our heads into things HARRY. - Dumbledore gives no shits about a student falling asleep in class - It’s so creepy to me that Pettigrew uses his friends’ nickname for him as his criminal alias - Sirius knew Harry would refuse to go to Dumbledore for help even when he should and did the dadly thing by going over his head I love you Sirius - Dumbledore.  Why would you suggest this poor man live in a cave and eat rats.  Why would you do this.  You had so many alternatives.  You could have been Secret-Keeper and let him live in an actual house somewhere.  You could have put Disillusionment Charms over him.  You could have advocated for his innocence and used your influence over the Ministry.  I just… WHY. - Dumbledore is shady af. - “You and he are connected” just explain that he has a piece of his soul like damn - The Ministry considering Frank Bryce’s disappearance unimportant is so skeevy. - Neville baby I’m so sorry ;-; - No, it doesn’t make sense to me that I love Bellatrix so much and yet I call Neville my child.  I like villains, and she’s a great one.  But GAH NEVILLE AND FRANK AND ALICE ;-; - “What made you think [Snape had] really stopped supporting Voldemort?”  Because, Harry, he wanted to bang your mom and that makes everything hunky-dory.